Brene Brown - Dare Greatly

My writer friend Alison sent me a link to a Ted Talk entitled " Listening to Shame" by Brene Brown which has really inspired my week! 

I was a little put off by the title if I am being totally honest, not really knowing what to expect. I was very surprised!

I was interested to learn more and found her 2010 TEDx Houston talk on the power of vulnerability. 

This  is one of the most watched talks on TED.com, with over 15 million views. She has spent the past decade studying vulnerability, courage, worthiness, and shame. She asks how do we learn to embrace our vulnerabilities and imperfections so that we can engage in our lives from a place of authenticity and worthiness? How do we cultivate the courage, compassion, and connection that we need to recognize that we are enough – that we are worthy of love, belonging, and joy? Give these talks a go - you'll be surprised as I was I hope.

Brene quotes this by Teddy Roosevelt : 

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.”

In simpler terms Brene explains why we find being vulnerable such a hard thing to do.

“When we spend our lives waiting until we’re perfect or bulletproof before we walk into the arena, we ultimately sacrifice relationships and opportunities that may not be recoverable, we squander our precious time, and we turn our backs on our gifts, those unique contributions that only we can make,” says Brown. “Perfect and bulletproof are seductive, but they don’t exist in the human experience.”

 In my mind it's about getting out there, having a presence and living -  it's OK that we're not perfect and that what we do or are trying to achieve is not perfect. We need to just have to work at it - yes we may fail along the way but that's OK - it's the experience that will make us and is part of our own individual stories. No two person's stories are the same. We don't have to manipulate ourselves to be someone we're not. It's about being grateful for who we are and the life we live and having the courage to dare greatly in whatever we do.

Here are some inspirational quotes from Brene Brown:

• “What we know matters but who we are matters more.”
•  “Hope is a function of struggle.”
•  “Vulnerability is not weakness, and the uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure we face every day are not optional. Our only choice is a question of engagement. Our willingness to own and engage with our vulnerability determines the depth of our courage and the clarity of our purpose; the level to which we protect ourselves from being vulnerable is a measure of our fear and disconnection.”
• “To love ourselves and support each other in the process of becoming real is perhaps the greatest single act of daring greatly.” 

and my favourite:

 “One of the biggest surprises in this research was learning that fitting in and belonging are not the same thing. In fact, fitting in is one of the greatest barriers to belonging. Fitting in is about assessing a situation and becoming who you need to be in order to be accepted. Belonging, on the other hand, doesn’t require us to change who we are; it requires us to be who we are.”

                      Check out Brene Brown's website - there is so much more!

Thank you Alison my daring friend! Yes that's daring and not darling - although she's both.